Mary O’Neal finds a home at JR’s Bar & Grill

By Johnny Trlica

On any given day, 28,000 to 30,000 children are in Texas’ foster care program. Many of those kids are placed into the system due to abuse, neglect and parental drug issues.
Statistics from the Texas Department of Family and Protective Services reveal the state’s foster care system faces a critical shortage of licensed homes, with roughly 40 percent of foster families discontinuing within the first year. In 2023, there were around 12,639 children waiting for adoptive families. More than 1,000 children age out of the system annually.
Many children in foster care are bounced around from home to home, never adopted and eventually age out of the system. A home is something they dreamt of but never found.
Thankfully, there is light at the end of the system, and Mary O’Neal found that light when she landed a job within the LGBTQ+ community. Going from bar back to bartender at JR’s Bar & Grill, she has found the family she never had as a child.
Mary O’Neal is the Montrose Star Bartender of the Month.

Name:
Mary O’Neal.

Where is your hometown?
Baytown, Texas.

Tell us about your experience bartending.
I honestly couldn’t ask for a better job. I’m incredibly grateful to the owner of my company for giving me the opportunity to become a bartender. Going from working the floor, to bar backing, to working the door — and now behind the bar — has been a long time coming. The transition felt seamless, and I truly feel like I’m right where I’m meant to be. I love my customers and the community so much. They’ve embraced me with open arms, and the love and support have been nothing short of amazing.

What are the special challenges of bartending in an extremely high-volume bar?
One of the biggest challenges is balancing speed with quality service. It’s important to me that every customer feels acknowledged and taken care of, even in a fast-paced environment. I make a conscious effort not to overlook anyone and to serve each guest in a timely manner. Above all, I strive to ensure that every customer feels seen, valued and never neglected.

Do you have a drink specialty?
Yes, I do — it’s called the Pink Mary. It’s made with vanilla vodka, watermelon sweet-and-sour and a splash of simple syrup. Since pink is my favorite color, I thought the name was a perfect fit.

What is your philosophy on being a good bartender?
It’s about more than just making drinks. It’s about being there for people. You have to wear many hats. Sometimes a guest has had a long or difficult day and just needs someone to listen. They come to their favorite bartender because they feel comfortable, and I take pride in being that person for them. After a long day, people choose to come to me to relax and unwind, and I don’t take that lightly. A good bartender listens without judgment, creates a welcoming space and remembers the little things — like a regular’s favorite drink — so they feel right at home the moment they walk in.

Besides the money, what do you enjoy about being a bartender?
I love bartending because it gives me the opportunity to genuinely impact people’s day. Being able to lift someone’s mood when they’ve had a rough time, or simply being a person they can come to and feel comfortable around, is incredibly rewarding to me. I enjoy connecting with people from all walks of life, hearing their stories, and creating an environment where they can relax, laugh, and feel at ease. Whether it’s through good conversation, a few corny dad jokes or just bringing positive energy, I take pride in making people smile and helping them forget their stress, even if it’s just for a little while. It’s about creating memorable experiences and meaningful connections.

Do you get hit on a lot and what’s your usual response?
I don’t really get hit on that much, to be honest. But there was this one time. A really pretty girl came up to my bar, and it was super loud, so we were basically yelling over the music. At one point, she asked me if I was married but I thought she asked me my name. So, I just said, “Yeah.” She grabbed her drinks, turned to her friend, and loudly said, “Yeah, she’s married.” I was like, “Wait — no, no! I thought you asked me was my name Mary!” But by then she had already walked off, and I couldn’t leave the bar to go after her. So yeah… I guess that was the one that got away.

What is your pet peeve about being a bartender?
The one thing that gets under my skin a bit is when people reach over the bar and grab
things like limes or straws. I’m big on keeping everything clean and sanitary, so it throws me off when different hands are reaching into items I’m using for multiple customers.
It’s not just about me, it’s about making sure everyone I serve is getting something handled in a safe, clean way.

What is the craziest thing you’ve ever seen from behind the bar?
Honestly, I haven’t really seen anything too crazy. JR’s is a pretty chill spot with a great atmosphere; everyone’s calm and it’s always good vibes. Every once in a while, you might see a small disagreement between customers, but it never escalates and gets handled quickly. The craziest thing I’ve heard? Someone trying to open a tab without a credit card.

If you were not a bartender, what would you be doing?
If I weren’t bartending, I’d probably be working in a hotel. I worked in that industry for several years, and while it’s still customer service and working with people every day, I really enjoy that aspect. I like interacting with guests and helping resolve issues, especially when it comes to de-escalating situations. I have many years of experience in customer service and genuinely enjoy that type of work.

Tell us something people do not know about you and will be surprised to learn.
I grew up moving from foster home to foster home when I was young, so I never really had a traditional family. That’s part of why I’m so close to the community now. The moment I stepped into JR’s, I felt welcomed and experienced a sense of love I hadn’t really known before. It was something really special and I never wanted to leave. I’m incredibly grateful that JR’s has become my family and that my customers feel like family, too. It means everything to me. Coming into work every day genuinely makes me happy, not just because of the job, but because of the people. They’re more than customers — they’re my support system. I’m truly thankful for where I’ve ended up and the family I’ve found here.

Single, married, or not telling?
I am single. I’m not really looking for any-
body right now. I’m more into focusing on myself and my health at the moment.

Are you on social media?
Yes, I’m on Instagram, Facebook and TikTok.

Where and when can we catch you for a drink?
You can find me at JR’s Bar and Grill Thursday through Monday. Come grab a drink from me or one of the amazing bartenders here at JR’s. Can’t wait to see you.

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