Shaping our World and Ourselves through Consciousness
- August 12, 2024
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- Rafa
- Posted in Words Have Power
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WORDS HAVE POWER
By Dr. Julie Hollingsworth, PhD, LCDC, ICADC and Sarah Hollingsworth
Words have power. Think back to the words that were used around you when you were young — think about how they shaped you, how they molded your world and your future. Now, think about the way you want your world to be shaped, how you want your words to affect the people around you.
Part of consciousness is speaking with intention. We’ve all heard of affirmations, but positive self-talk doesn’t stop at the bathroom sink or before the big game — the way we speak and think in every moment affects us. From the time we were infants, the way we were spoken to helped us decide who we were. Our family called us strong and brave when we fell on the playground, so we stopped crying. Our teachers told us we were smart when we answered a question correctly, so we kept raising our hands.
We pass this power of language down through our ancestry, led by our grandparents before our parents and their grandparents before theirs, and as we grow and change as a people, so does the meaning we assign to words. In this way, our language is both a time capsule and a tool for change. Thoughts and beliefs become speech, speech becomes behavior, behavior influences thoughts… this is an interwoven cycle that lift us up or brings us down, and as adults, we are the only ones who can decide that effect.
Whose voice do you hear in your head when you make a mistake? What do you hear when you succeed? By practicing consciousness day to day and changing the voice we hear when we are at our lowest, we can rewrite the script — we can hear how strong we are when we fall instead of how clumsy, and we can focus on the questions we get right, even on our own.
Before we can rewrite the script, we need to understand the rough draft. We need to take an inventory of the messages we hear and the effect they have on us in the moment, and then we need to choose which ones to get rid of. No matter how conscious our parents were, no matter how hard they tried, not every message they gave us is going to serve us today. Once we know what to keep and what to leave behind, we have a clean slate, and then we can begin.
All parts of consciousness take practice, and there will be times when you find yourself rewriting your script repeatedly. You may want to work with a therapist, counselor or trusted advisor, particularly if the messages you are leaving behind are painful ones. There’s no rule that says a conscious path must be walked alone and, in fact, many discourage it. However you get there, whomever you get there with, may it be a safe and joyful journey.
By the time you have created a strong foundation for yourself, you will have a great deal of practice, and then it may be time to direct your careful attention more outward. Just as our words affect our own selves, so do they affect the people around us. Whether you are surrounded by children or peers, there is one thing you can control: your language. You cannot decide for a person what they receive from you, but you can decide what you give. In simpler terms, you cannot rewrite someone else’s script or tell them how to interpret what you say, but you can be careful and intentional with the language you choose and the tone with which you use it.
It is up to each person whether they decide to be conscious in this way, and many will choose not to. A conscious person does not judge, and certainly does not shame, others for the path that they choose to take. It is not our business what people think of us, and it is not our business what another person thinks of themselves. No matter how much we know of their story and how empathetic we are, we cannot fully understand their situation, and it would be inaccurate and a waste of energy to judge them without that understanding.
When we learn to harness our words in self-talk and when we choose to wield them carefully with others, we take back our power. That is how we shape our world and control our future. In times like this, when so much is out of our control, it is important to remember the power that we do have. What would happen if consciousness were mainstream? How much would be out of our control then?
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