A brown m & m sitting on top of a wooden bench.

We’re not perfect, but they’re nuts 


By Johnny Trlica

Commentary: It is on T-shirts, bumper stickers, and pins with six simple words: “We’re not perfect, but they’re nuts.†The Democratic Party began using the phrase several years ago to raise money, but little did they realize how prophetic those words would become. The opposition party is nuts! 

Right-wingers have lost their minds over a beer endorsement. Bud Light sent an influencer named Dylan Mulvaney a handful of beers. Mulvaney, in turn, posted a video of herself using said beers to celebrate both March Madness and her first year of womanhood. She is trans. 

Videos of transphobes smashing bottles of beers and Kid Rock shooting a stack of suds went viral.  

In case you’ve been down I-10 smelling the bluebonnets for the past few months, you know that trans people are currently front and center in America’s culture war. They are conservatives’ new boogeyman. Anti-trans sentiment is sweeping the FOX/OAN/Newsmax stratosphere like a blitzkrieg that would make Nazi Germany envious. 

The Bud Light controversy fits into the right’s playbook of needing a vulnerable minority group to feed white fear. In years past it was welfare queens, Black Lives Matter, caravans of immigrants, and marriage equality proponents.  

Did someone blow their pilot light out? 

Bud Light isn’t the only consumer product that caused conservatives to lose their shit. Nick Adams (Alpha Male), Australian-born American conservative political commentator and author tweeted, “M&M’s have gone WOKE! Mars, the company behind M&M’s, launched a nuclear strike in the war on men by unveiling a package with ONLY the female M&M’s. This is sexist and NOT inspirational AT ALL! We must BOYCOTT M&M’s until the alpha male M&M’s get their own exclusive package.â€Â 

“Mars Wrigley has debuted a new promotional wrapper for M&Ms that features three female candy characters, and introduces a new Purple M&M along with Green and Brown. Mars Wrigley has announced they would be donating some of the profits from these M&M sales to organizations that support a variety of professional pursuits by women,†reports Forbes Magazine. 

The self-acclaimed Alpha Male apparently got his ego bruised by a piece of candy. Ex-Fox host Tucker Carlson spent numerous shows raging about M&M’s going woke.  

Both men are not playing with a full deck. 

In the Tennessee House, three Democratic Congressmen joined in a floor demonstration against gun violence after six people at a Nashville Christian school were killed. Two of the demonstrators are black and one is white. The Republican controlled House voted to expel two of them. You can guess which two. Their racism was on full display. And like Dixie Carter said on Designing Women, “This is the South and we’re proud of our crazy people. We don’t hide them up in the attic, we bring them right down to the living room to show them off. No one in the South ever asks if you have crazy people in your family, they just ask what side they’re on.â€Â Â 

The Tennessee House is a nuthouse. 

A year ago this month, 19 students and two teachers were murdered at an elementary school in Uvalde, Texas. A year earlier, Governor Greg Abbot declared Texas to be a “Second Amendment sanctuary.” He instituted legislation that limits firearm restrictions and expands gun access in the state. 

Permitless carry was the highest profile gun bill in the more than a dozen new gun laws to receive Abbott’s signature. “You could say that I signed into law today some laws that protect gun rights, but today, I signed documents that instill freedom in the Lone Star State,” said the governor. 

After the Uvalde shooting, no new pieces of gun reform legislation moved through Texas’ Republican controlled government. 

Choosing guns over kids. That’s not only batshit crazy, it’s deadly. 

South Carolina Republicans are pushing legislation that would make a woman who has an abortion subject to the state’s homicide laws, which include the death penalty. Let’s repeat that. A woman who has an abortion could be sentenced to death.  

That’s nuttier than a squirrel turd at a pecan festival. 

Matt Gaetz, Lauren Boebert, Marjorie Taylor Greene and George Santos (AKA Kitara Ravache) are just a few elected Republicans who are nuttier than a five-pound fruitcake. From Jewish space lasers causing California wildfires to Christmas cards featuring assault rifles, they prove you don’t have to hang from a tree to be a nut.  

They ban books. They ban drag queens reading books. They ban a woman’s right to choose. They ban saying gay. They wage war on beer and candy but make love to assault rifles. They say they love the LGBTQ+ community but have over 400 pieces of anti-LGBTQ legislation either passed or pending in state legislatures. 

They say they love children but do nothing to keep them from being mowed down in their classrooms. They say they are not racist but take actions that can only be interpreted as racist. 

Just like the candy they ranted about a while ago, today’s Republican party is full of nuts. 

The views and opinions expressed in this article are those of the writer and do not necessarily represent those of the Montrose Star. Johnny Trlica is the editor of Houston Rainbow Herald Facebook page and has been published in several newspapers and magazines. He grew up in Rosenberg, Texas, lived for over 30 years in the Montrose and now resides in Galveston, Texas. He may be contacted at HRHeditor@gmail.com.

Related Posts

About author

Related Posts

Comments are closed.

Do not miss